A Life Changing Event

Published in April, 2010                                        

By Asia S. Hinton

No matter what you look like people will always stare at you, is what my grandmother has always taught me.

These are the words of 19-year-old Towson University student Jacqueline Miller, as she recounts the day that ultimately changed her life.

It was 6 a.m. on January 30, 1995, and 5-year-old Jacqueline was calmly sleeping at her friends’ house.

As Miller slept, the three story house she’s in was burning to its foundation because of someone’s lighted cigarette that caught fire on a couch. Flames take over the building making it difficult for anyone to enter or exit. No smoke alarms rung and neighbors fail to aid Miller and her family in trying to escape.

A lucky bystander

While the flames grew stronger, Miller and her family began losing hope. Luckily a bystander decided to lend a hand.

“This particular day this guy took a detour to work and he saw that the house was on fire,” Miller said. “Nobody was trying to help. The people who lived next door were trying to get their stuff out of their houses so that it wouldn’t burn.”

The man who had a baseball and a bat in his car tried first to bust the second story window with the ball, when that failed he then threw his bat, the third time was successful and finally he found a metal trashcan top that was able to break the glass.

Since the man was unable to get inside the house, Miller’s mother was forced to throw her younger brother out the window with hopes that the man would catch him. Unable to catch him, Miller’s brother smashed into the sidewalk’s concrete, breaking both his hips, an arm and destroying the right side of his face from the impact of the fall.

Miller who was a floor above her mother and brother was unable to be rescued by her mom because of the flames. Leaving her daughter behind, Miller’s mother also jumped out of the second story window, but instead of landing on her feet, she fell on her head breaking her neck and her back.

Help arrives

Minutes later firefighters arrived to put out the flames. While they thought that everyone in the house was dead, one firefighter was determined to check no matter the risk.

“Once the firefighters came they said that everyone in the house was dead,” Miller said. “But one firefighter had actually found me and he put his mask to my face to see if I was breathing and he saw me take little tiny breaths.”

Miller was taken to Bayview Hospital’s Burn Unit, where she was quickly discharged and sent to Johns Hopkins Children’s Hospital because of her age.

Miller immediately underwent surgery as doctors placed a trachea in her throat to help her breathe on her own. As Miller endured countless surgeries her family was told to assume the worst.

“While I was in surgery my grandmother came to the hospital and the doctors told her that I wasn’t going to make it through the night and for her to get prepared,” Miller said.

Little did Miller and her family know that she would beat the odds that doctors had against her, but it wouldn’t be easy. Almost four years passed and Miller’s time was spent traveling from one hospital to another.

“I was in the hospital for a while,” Miller said. “I stayed at Johns Hopkins Children’s Hospital for eighteen months and then I was transferred from there to Mount Washington Pediatric Hospital, where I was there for two years before I was able to come home.”

Back to school

After years of being hospitalized, Miller’s doctors recommended that she be enrolled back in school. However, because Miller was out of school for four years, when she returned at the age of nine, she was put in the second grade.

“They started me with special education,” Miller said. “But my teacher realized that I didn’t need to be in that class because it was nothing wrong with my mind, everything was just physical.”

After many referrals from her doctors and teachers, Miller was able to be put in the fourth grade where she belonged. Because she was now attending school, Miller had to re-learn how to write. However this was a difficult task because after the fire Miller lost all ten fingers and her right arm was cut off to the elbow.

“It was difficult to write,” Miller said. “I spent many years of having different devices to try to help me to write and any other devices the doctors could think of to try to get me to lead a normal life.”

While Miller refused to let devices do the work for her, she decided that she was going to try things her own way.

“Once the doctors did another surgery on my arm, one day I decided to pick up a pen and I just taught myself how to write,” Miller said. “And I begin adapting myself to writing.”

Growth stunt

Although Miller mastered the technique of writing, one thing she was not able to master was her growth. Suffering third degree burns over ninety percent of her body, Miller’s growth was altered.

“The burns stunted the growth of my feet, so my feet are the same size as a five-year-old,” Miller said. “It also stunted my height. At age five I was taller than the average five-year-old because my dad was really tall, so I would have been really tall too, but right now I am only 4’11.’’

Though Miller lost all the hair on her body such as eyebrows, eyelashes, and the hair on her arms and legs, she miraculously kept the hair on her head. She considers the loss of hair on her legs a good thing because she doesn’t have to worry about shaving.

An average teen

At nineteen Miller is an average teenage girl. She spends her weekends enjoying life and hanging out with friends.

“I go out every weekend,” Miller said. “I am always going to the movies, the mall, parties and I absolutely love shopping. I do just about everything. It is nothing that I don’t do.”

While Miller is just about able to do everything herself, she still needs the assistance of a nurse. Tonya Hatchett is a Licensed Practical Nurse who accompanies Miller to school daily. Hatchett treats Miller as any other teen and only attends school with her day by day because of the trachea that was placed in Miller’s throat.

“I’ve been working with Jackie since November 2007 and she’s a typical teenager doing everything herself,” Hatchett said. “She’s stubborn and she has her same teenage attitudes. She’s very prissy always wearing pocketbooks and girly shoes, but overall she is a lot of fun to be around.”

Miss independent

Miller chooses to be very independent, refusing to receive help from anyone. In the mornings she engages in everyday activities on her own.

“I bathe myself, I get myself dressed and I feed myself,” Miller said. “The only thing is that in the morning my grandmother does my hair everyday.”

Old to many, new to some

While Miller’s condition is old news to her, it’s new to those who have never seen her before, especially to many of her teachers. Lena Ampadu, an African American Studies teacher at Towson University, was shocked when Miller first arrived in her class.

Ampadu said she didn’t receive a memo informing her that she would have a disabled student in her class, nor did she know how she would be able to teach a class of 32 and accommodate Miller’s needs as well.

“I was surprised that she was able to pick up sheets of paper that I placed on her desk,” Ampadu said. “I wondered how she could maneuver around because she didn’t have any hands, but besides placing papers on her desk, I don’t have to accommodate her in any other way.”

A look into the future

Miller, a mass communications major is hoping that upon graduation she is able to find a job writing journalistic columns. She hopes that with such communication skills she will be able to travel abroad, writing stories on individuals who have similar conditions as her, but who are unable to receive that help that she was given.

“I want to be able to let others who have my condition know that there are places out there that can help them, as well as doctors who are willing to travel to such countries to help them,” Miller said.

As Miller continues to live life day by day, she refuses to let what happened to her 14 years ago control her life. She doesn’t live life depressed, but instead she tries to make the best of the life that many thought she would not have.

“I don’t see myself as being burnt,” Miller said. “I see myself as being a regular person doing things just like everyone else. I’ve never felt sorry for myself and I hate for people to feel sorry for me. I look at it as ok, I was burnt, there are other people out there that are in worse conditions than what I am in, so why feel sorry for myself.”